Many people with panic disorder or another anxiety disorder experience loneliness that is pervasive and overwhelming. This can be especially true if one becomes isolated due to agoraphobia. Or, sometimes shame, embarrassment and a desire to keep the condition a secret prevent someone from making the connections they need with others.
Loneliness is subjective in the sense that it is based on one’s individual perceptions about his or her relationships with others. For example, someone with panic disorder may be surrounded by supportive friends and family, but feel an overwhelming sense of loneliness inside. Panic disorder can lead to feeling fearful, different or defective in some way, and this can affect one’s self-esteem and sense of self-worth. This perception may be irrational, illogical and just plain untrue, but, nevertheless, it is as powerful as if it were factual.
It takes great effort and courage to confront loneliness -- and even greater effort and courage to make the necessary changes to find relief from its consuming grip. But, it is possible. And, your efforts will be greatly rewarded as you find it possible to feel a sense of connectedness and belonging with others.
Here are some suggestions to get you started:
- Embrace Aloneness
We must have a solid relationship with ourselves before we can have healthy relationships with others. To achieve this, we must experience aloneness. By becoming self-aware and sensing our separation from others, we can experience life-enhancing relationships. We become aware that we cannot depend on others for self-confirmation. If we fail to come to terms with aloneness, our relationships may exhibit crippling patterns of dependency.
- Reach Out to Others
Maintain your current social relationships and reach out to those of your past. You know that old friend or long lost relative you haven’t talked to in quite some time? Give her a call. You’re not calling to talk about your loneliness -- you’re calling to make a connection. Reaching out and communicating with others can help you feel less lonely. Even if you have no friends or family that you can reach out to, there are plenty of options -- such as forums and chat rooms -- available on the Internet. You can start right here on About.com in the Panic Disorder Forum.
- Get Involved in Activities
Meeting people with similar interests is a great way to develop friendships. Have you always wanted to learn more about photography or hone your computer skills? Check out your local community college for adult education courses that suit your interests. Check your local newspaper or city, village or township offices for upcoming events that peak your curiosity. Volunteering for a cause you embrace is another way to make contact with like-minded people.
- Join a Support Group
By joining an anxiety or other type of support group, you can make connections with others who share similar fears, concerns and difficulties. Get information about groups in your area by contacting mental healthcare providers, community mental health agencies or your local city or village government office. You may also find information in your local newspaper or by searching the Internet.
- Get Professional Help
Sometimes, despite your best efforts, loneliness continues to be a problem. If your loneliness is overwhelming, or if you’re feeling depressed, you may want to see a therapist. With a therapist’s help, you can more deeply explore your loneliness and develop a plan to free yourself from its grip.
Source:
Corey, Gerald. (2009). Theory and Practice of Counseling and Psychotherapy (8th ed.). Belmont, CA: Thomson Brooks/Cole.
